Comments on: … and then “shut up.” http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/ Pragmatic Job Search Advice Sat, 19 May 2012 00:00:04 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Are you positive about your job search? | The Write Solution http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-4224 Are you positive about your job search? | The Write Solution Mon, 18 Jul 2011 20:49:49 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-4224 [...] What kind of tapes play in your head all day long? I’m not talking about your iPod play list. Are you saying positive things to you about you or is your dialogue peppered with, “You idiot. I can’t believe you were so stupid. I’ll never find a job. It’s not my fault, the world is against me. I never do anything right. I’m always late.” – enough! You get the idea. You spend more time with yourself than you do with anyone else on the planet. Be encouraging in what you say to yourself. (For more on this topic: “What are YOU saying about you?“and “…And then shut up“) [...] [...] What kind of tapes play in your head all day long? I’m not talking about your iPod play list. Are you saying positive things to you about you or is your dialogue peppered with, “You idiot. I can’t believe you were so stupid. I’ll never find a job. It’s not my fault, the world is against me. I never do anything right. I’m always late.” – enough! You get the idea. You spend more time with yourself than you do with anyone else on the planet. Be encouraging in what you say to yourself. (For more on this topic: “What are YOU saying about you?“and “…And then shut up“) [...]

]]> By: Dawn http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1011 Dawn Mon, 12 Jul 2010 13:22:26 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-1011 Absolutely Gayle!! (AKA, Coach T). Positive internal sentences, knowing what you're going to say in touchy situations, understanding the needs of audience all create a positive interview experience as well as positive life adventures. Thanks for commenting! (BTW -- for those of you needing a little help with accountability and reaching goals, Coach T offers a GREAT service. Check out her site by clicking on her name.) Absolutely Gayle!! (AKA, Coach T). Positive internal sentences, knowing what you’re going to say in touchy situations, understanding the needs of audience all create a positive interview experience as well as positive life adventures.

Thanks for commenting!

(BTW — for those of you needing a little help with accountability and reaching goals, Coach T offers a GREAT service. Check out her site by clicking on her name.)

]]> By: Dawn http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1010 Dawn Mon, 12 Jul 2010 13:17:36 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-1010 Julie - You're right, I don't discourage sharing during a consultation either. People do sometimes "just need to get it out of their system" so they can move forward. And I'm happy to be that outlet for them. I too check to see how they're going to handle things during an interview and will help develop a positive approach to difficult topics. However when sharing becomes a roadblock to employment, then it's too much. An interview isn't "True Confessions" time. It's a time to shine. If a client can shine by purging with me, then I'm all for it. If they need more assistance than I can provide, I, like you, will help them find a coach or other resource to handle whatever it is they're battling. Bottom line, confidence and a positive presentation is paramount during a search. It's not time to air dirty laundry with a potential employer. Too often, people spill their guts because they've not taken the time to properly prepare and that can be a major obstacle to employment. As you and Susan indicated, working with a career professional is a great way to avoid "foot in mouth" syndrome. Good insights and clarifications Julie! Thanks!! Julie –

You’re right, I don’t discourage sharing during a consultation either. People do sometimes “just need to get it out of their system” so they can move forward. And I’m happy to be that outlet for them. I too check to see how they’re going to handle things during an interview and will help develop a positive approach to difficult topics.

However when sharing becomes a roadblock to employment, then it’s too much. An interview isn’t “True Confessions” time. It’s a time to shine. If a client can shine by purging with me, then I’m all for it. If they need more assistance than I can provide, I, like you, will help them find a coach or other resource to handle whatever it is they’re battling.

Bottom line, confidence and a positive presentation is paramount during a search. It’s not time to air dirty laundry with a potential employer. Too often, people spill their guts because they’ve not taken the time to properly prepare and that can be a major obstacle to employment. As you and Susan indicated, working with a career professional is a great way to avoid “foot in mouth” syndrome.

Good insights and clarifications Julie! Thanks!!

]]> By: Coach T http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1006 Coach T Mon, 12 Jul 2010 03:38:14 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-1006 Great article! For many people it is easy to give in to self doubt and criticism (and overshare). Creating positive self conversations is the first step to a better self image and self-esteem. Developing a positive self conversation is not only good advice for job searching, it is also good advice for life. Great article! For many people it is easy to give in to self doubt and criticism (and overshare). Creating positive self conversations is the first step to a better self image and self-esteem.

Developing a positive self conversation is not only good advice for job searching, it is also good advice for life.

]]> By: Julie Walraven | Resume Services http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1005 Julie Walraven | Resume Services Mon, 12 Jul 2010 03:36:33 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-1005 Hi Dawn, I always check if people tell me a past story how they plan to discuss the subject in an interview but because of the way I write resumes and help them target their searches, I never discourage anyone from telling me anything. If they feel safe enough to tell me how they are hurting, then we can work through what to say in an interview. I would like it less if they didn't share something with me and then blurted it out in an interview. For years, I have had clients tell me that they finally feel confident to move forward after meeting with me and discussing their issues. If I feel they need further help, I recommend trained counselors but I think sometimes job seekers just have to get things out of their systems to move on. Hi Dawn, I always check if people tell me a past story how they plan to discuss the subject in an interview but because of the way I write resumes and help them target their searches, I never discourage anyone from telling me anything. If they feel safe enough to tell me how they are hurting, then we can work through what to say in an interview. I would like it less if they didn’t share something with me and then blurted it out in an interview.

For years, I have had clients tell me that they finally feel confident to move forward after meeting with me and discussing their issues. If I feel they need further help, I recommend trained counselors but I think sometimes job seekers just have to get things out of their systems to move on.

]]> By: Dawn http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1004 Dawn Mon, 12 Jul 2010 02:07:10 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-1004 Susan - Great add: "Get feedback from an experienced career coach." People are trained to do their jobs; not conduct a job search and interview. Then when it's time to make a change, they wing it and wonder why it doesn't work. Research, rehearsal and planning are integral to job search success. And a coach can help make those daunting tasks seem much more manageable. So happy you stopped by. Thank you!! Susan –

Great add: “Get feedback from an experienced career coach.” People are trained to do their jobs; not conduct a job search and interview. Then when it’s time to make a change, they wing it and wonder why it doesn’t work. Research, rehearsal and planning are integral to job search success. And a coach can help make those daunting tasks seem much more manageable.

So happy you stopped by. Thank you!!

]]> By: Dawn http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1003 Dawn Mon, 12 Jul 2010 01:43:45 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-1003 Gayle - You're right. It doesn't surprise me that you and I share similar views on this. I am astounded by what people will share, unprompted and unnecessarily, in myriad circumstances -- not just job search. You are SO right: "Let it all hang out? Forget it!" Thanks for adding to the conversation. Gayle –

You’re right. It doesn’t surprise me that you and I share similar views on this. I am astounded by what people will share, unprompted and unnecessarily, in myriad circumstances — not just job search. You are SO right: “Let it all hang out? Forget it!”

Thanks for adding to the conversation.

]]> By: Tweets that mention … and then “shut up.” | The Write Solution -- Topsy.com http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1002 Tweets that mention … and then “shut up.” | The Write Solution -- Topsy.com Mon, 12 Jul 2010 01:30:23 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-1002 [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Dawn Bugni, Gayle Howard. Gayle Howard said: .RT @DawnBugni: Blogging: My latest "...and then shut up" http://is.gd/doqNe >>>Always terrific work Dawn! [...] [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Dawn Bugni, Gayle Howard. Gayle Howard said: .RT @DawnBugni: Blogging: My latest "…and then shut up" http://is.gd/doqNe >>>Always terrific work Dawn! [...]

]]> By: Susan Whitcomb http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1001 Susan Whitcomb Mon, 12 Jul 2010 01:21:56 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-1001 Love it, Dawn. So true. "TMI" strikes far too often, and as your example points out, jobseekers are often clueless. Yes, practice and rehearse, and get feedback from an experienced career coach! Love it, Dawn. So true. “TMI” strikes far too often, and as your example points out, jobseekers are often clueless. Yes, practice and rehearse, and get feedback from an experienced career coach!

]]> By: Gayle Howard http://write-solution.com/2010/07/11/%e2%80%a6-and-then-%e2%80%9cshut-up-%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1000 Gayle Howard Mon, 12 Jul 2010 01:21:53 +0000 http://write-solution.com/?p=962#comment-1000 This is a terrific article Dawn, and of course, you won't be the least surprised to know that you and I have similar views on this subject! I've had clients tell me to include maternity leave, sexual harassment cases, and the biggest one of the lot, including a woman's time as being the victim of an abusive spouse! I wrote about it here: http://www.theexecutivebrand.com/2010/04/29/resume_and_life_experiences/ This is so true. Of course there is no need to lie, but not everything is relevant to the job either! Pointing out potential flaws to your candidacy (particularly when it is not related remotely to the job) is not noble or transparent. It's just self-sabotage! Another great article! This is a terrific article Dawn, and of course, you won’t be the least surprised to know that you and I have similar views on this subject! I’ve had clients tell me to include maternity leave, sexual harassment cases, and the biggest one of the lot, including a woman’s time as being the victim of an abusive spouse! I wrote about it here: http://www.theexecutivebrand.com/2010/04/29/resume_and_life_experiences/

This is so true. Of course there is no need to lie, but not everything is relevant to the job either! Pointing out potential flaws to your candidacy (particularly when it is not related remotely to the job) is not noble or transparent. It’s just self-sabotage!

Another great article!

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